myfairlady

19 year old Visual Communications Major
at FIDM in Los Angeles.
Aspiring producer and film editor.

This is now a documentation of my daily life, work, inspiration and journal entries.
hope you enjoy!

Expect anything from anyone; the angel was once the devil.

I want to lay in bed with you, look into your eyes and tell you everything. I want to know you, like no one has known you before. I want to be your crying shoulder. I want you to tell me your deepest secrets, your darkest fears and your biggest accomplishments. I want you to know me like no one has before. I want to hold your hand and tell you my biggest secret. I want to tell you about my past as you tell me about your present. I want to talk about our future together.  I want you to love me like you’ve never loved before and i’ll be sure to do the same. I want nothing more then to become an us. I want to finally feel what’s it like to be loved, to be wanted. I want to be careless, selfless and young…with you.  I want this to work. I want this to play out as planned. I want this dream to finally come true. I have hope, but that can only go so far. I’m hoping you’ll remember me, I’m hoping you’ll feel the same way.  I’m different, I hope you’ll see that.

I want to lay in bed with you, look into your eyes and tell you everything. I want to know you, like no one has known you before. I want to be your crying shoulder. I want you to tell me your deepest secrets, your darkest fears and your biggest accomplishments.

I want you to know me like no one has before. I want to hold your hand and tell you my biggest secret. I want to tell you about my past as you tell me about your present. I want to talk about our future together. 

I want you to love me like you’ve never loved before and i’ll be sure to do the same. I want nothing more then to become an us. I want to finally feel what’s it like to be loved, to be wanted. I want to be careless, selfless and young…with you. 

I want this to work. I want this to play out as planned. I want this dream to finally come true.

I have hope, but that can only go so far. I’m hoping you’ll remember me, I’m hoping you’ll feel the same way. 

I’m different, I hope you’ll see that.

(via yeahthathappened)

12.31.2011 Many people spend New Years Eve binge drinking with a few close friends and a number of people who they hate bitching and whining about everything from the past twelve months. I’ve heard it all-not having a boyfriend or girlfriend, not doing well in school, playing things “too” safe and not accomplishing their last New Years resolution. What gets me the most is when people blame their bad year on luck, “luck wasn’t on my side this year.” Many people my age seem to think their future is already laid out for them and they are just along for the ride. I feel sorry for these people, I pitty them for not taking chances, for not living. There are hundreds of thousands of people waiting for their time to come, waiting for life to happen. These people will relive the same exact uneventful year one after another. They’ll complain about how the past year was no different then the year before yet they’ll to nothing to ensure that this year is any different. If you are reading this and realize you are one of those people make a promise to yourself to make 2012 unlike any other. Take chances, meet new people. Try things you’d never before think of. Kiss a stranger, audition for a movie, do anything and everything.  This year my resolution is to not only better myself but to be fearless, be spontaneous. We all need to let go of our fears, let go of our past and focus on the future. Future friends, future careers and future loves. 

12.31.2011

Many people spend New Years Eve binge drinking with a few close friends and a number of people who they hate bitching and whining about everything from the past twelve months. I’ve heard it all-not having a boyfriend or girlfriend, not doing well in school, playing things “too” safe and not accomplishing their last New Years resolution. What gets me the most is when people blame their bad year on luck, “luck wasn’t on my side this year.” Many people my age seem to think their future is already laid out for them and they are just along for the ride. I feel sorry for these people, I pitty them for not taking chances, for not living. There are hundreds of thousands of people waiting for their time to come, waiting for life to happen. These people will relive the same exact uneventful year one after another. They’ll complain about how the past year was no different then the year before yet they’ll to nothing to ensure that this year is any different. If you are reading this and realize you are one of those people make a promise to yourself to make 2012 unlike any other. Take chances, meet new people. Try things you’d never before think of. Kiss a stranger, audition for a movie, do anything and everything. 

This year my resolution is to not only better myself but to be fearless, be spontaneous. We all need to let go of our fears, let go of our past and focus on the future. Future friends, future careers and future loves. 

(via louboutinheels)

As much as i wanted to come back home and visit my friends and my family, the longer i stay here the more i want to go back. Before coming back to Washington when people asked me where i’m from I never considered Los Angeles to be home, now that’s the only place I want to call home. Being back with my friends from high school made me realize how good I have it. I may be struggling with money and doing homework 90 percent of the time but I love what I’m doing, I’m having an amazing time and I’m actually doing something with my life. A lot of my friends moved out of the valley for college, most stayed in Washington but a few of us left for California, Arizona and the East Coast. I feel like no one has changed they are still stuck in the drink all day party all night mind set that I quickly grew out of. Don’t get me wrong I go out a lot in LA but I’d much rather be at an event, or a nice dinner or a chill bar listening to music and meeting new people then going out to the frats and house parties night after night like the rest of my former classmates do. 

Growing up people always told me I wouldn’t be able to last very long in the real world, I’d move home months after leaving and I’d stay in the valley just as everyone here does.  I started doubting myself but after living in Los Angeles for a short 3 months I’ve realized I can make it. It’s going to be rough and i’m going to break down but I’ve never been so happy before. I’ve never felt like I was meant to do something before I came to Los Angeles. I’m so happy with my decision to move and I’m excited for what this city has in store for me. 

Things you’ll never forget- No matter how hard you try, you’ll never forget your first love. You’ll never forget what started this relationship and what maybe, not so unfortunatly ended it. Soon after you find someone who you are intrigued by they will become your new love. As the months and years go on you’ll realize how in love you really are when you still remember the first place you saw him, the first words that were exchanged and the first real conversation you had. You’ll never forget where you first kissed him and how nervous you were. You’ll never forget the first night you spent together and how good it felt to just be held by the one you care most about. The first “I love you’s” will be with you no matter what happens between you two. Many people wonder when and how they know they are in love. If you ask me it’s when you  could be surrounded by all the people in the world but they are the only one you want. When you look back on all the time you’ve spent together and still remember their touch, their smell, their voice and their kiss. xoxo

Things you’ll never forget-

No matter how hard you try, you’ll never forget your first love. You’ll never forget what started this relationship and what maybe, not so unfortunatly ended it. Soon after you find someone who you are intrigued by they will become your new love.

As the months and years go on you’ll realize how in love you really are when you still remember the first place you saw him, the first words that were exchanged and the first real conversation you had. You’ll never forget where you first kissed him and how nervous you were. You’ll never forget the first night you spent together and how good it felt to just be held by the one you care most about. The first “I love you’s” will be with you no matter what happens between you two.

Many people wonder when and how they know they are in love. If you ask me it’s when you  could be surrounded by all the people in the world but they are the only one you want. When you look back on all the time you’ve spent together and still remember their touch, their smell, their voice and their kiss.

xoxo

(Source: lovequotesrus, via yourebeautifulxo)

Do you ever wonder who you’ll marry?Do you ever wonder if you two have met before? Do you ever wonder if they’re asking the same questions? Sure it may sound weird but sometimes I sit and think that maybe we haven’t met out soul mates yet. But is it possible that we’ve seen eachother? Maybe it was the boy in the corner at starbucks with his girlfriend, the lead in a major motion picture, that guy you pass on the way to school every morning or maybe you’ve seen eachother in your dreams. I believe that everyone has a soul mate but I don’t believe that everyone will find them.  Sometimes we think we are promised love.Sometimes we think we are promised a soul mate.  Many people think we were created in pairs, others think we were paired together after being put onto the earth. As we get older we seperate and get furter apart making it harder for us to find each other. Along the way complications may happen. You’ll lose trust in the opposite sex, you’ll have one too many heartbreaks or you’ll give up on finding love all together.  You may not realize it now but everything will fall together on it’s own. 

Do you ever wonder who you’ll marry?
Do you ever wonder if you two have met before? 
Do you ever wonder if they’re asking the same questions?


Sure it may sound weird but sometimes I sit and think that maybe we haven’t met out soul mates yet. But is it possible that we’ve seen eachother? Maybe it was the boy in the corner at starbucks with his girlfriend, the lead in a major motion picture, that guy you pass on the way to school every morning or maybe you’ve seen eachother in your dreams. I believe that everyone has a soul mate but I don’t believe that everyone will find them. 

Sometimes we think we are promised love.
Sometimes we think we are promised a soul mate. 

Many people think we were created in pairs, others think we were paired together after being put onto the earth. As we get older we seperate and get furter apart making it harder for us to find each other. Along the way complications may happen. You’ll lose trust in the opposite sex, you’ll have one too many heartbreaks or you’ll give up on finding love all together. 

You may not realize it now but everything will fall together on it’s own. 

(Source: hikoboshii)

After looking at this picture it’s got me in a funk, i want love. I’m often stuck alone and awake until three in the morning and if you don’t experience that often you wouldn’t understand what that begins to do to somebody’s head. As i’m laying in bed for the one, two, three some hours you couldn’t imagine all of the things that cross my mind. School, music, my future, what i’m having for dinner a week from then and the one thing that never fails to escape my mind week after week is how i’m always single. I’m nineteen years old and depending on what you consider a relationship to be i may or may not have been in one. I was sixteen when i had my first “boyfriend” we dated for two months and that was it. I’ve never had a winter love, no one’s ever taken me on a date to the fair to have cotton candy or ride the ferris wheel and i’ve definitely never had a valentine. I can’t help myself but to think that there is something wrong or that i’m doing something wrong at least. But in the end it always comes down to “settling”, which is something i don’t want to do. I don’t want to settle for something less then i deserve, i know what i want i’m just waiting for it to come around. I’ve been close to love once before with a guy i was with off and on for the past four years. We met my freshman year of high school when he was a junior. It was perfect, that was until everything fell apart. He’d leave unexpectedly, return when it was convenient for him but never once did he make “us” official. After being mind fucked for the next three and a half years i told myself it was over. I seemed to end something that was never really there to begin with. Not exactly unexpectedly we started talking again late August, right before I left for school. We talked every night, texted all day and he finally told me he loved me. Afterwards things started to spiral downhill. We were fighting everyday, saying things we knew we’d later regret and eventually we both lost hope. I’m not sure if we were actually in love or if we were just in love with the thought of being in love. I’ll never really know until i find love again. Advice to anyone who reads this, get out early if you’re not sure about things, if you have doubts. But hold on with everything you’ve got if you believe it is real. Always love as if it will be your last. 

After looking at this picture it’s got me in a funk, i want love.

I’m often stuck alone and awake until three in the morning and if you don’t experience that often you wouldn’t understand what that begins to do to somebody’s head. As i’m laying in bed for the one, two, three some hours you couldn’t imagine all of the things that cross my mind. School, music, my future, what i’m having for dinner a week from then and the one thing that never fails to escape my mind week after week is how i’m always single. I’m nineteen years old and depending on what you consider a relationship to be i may or may not have been in one. I was sixteen when i had my first “boyfriend” we dated for two months and that was it. I’ve never had a winter love, no one’s ever taken me on a date to the fair to have cotton candy or ride the ferris wheel and i’ve definitely never had a valentine. I can’t help myself but to think that there is something wrong or that i’m doing something wrong at least. But in the end it always comes down to “settling”, which is something i don’t want to do. I don’t want to settle for something less then i deserve, i know what i want i’m just waiting for it to come around. I’ve been close to love once before with a guy i was with off and on for the past four years. We met my freshman year of high school when he was a junior. It was perfect, that was until everything fell apart. He’d leave unexpectedly, return when it was convenient for him but never once did he make “us” official. After being mind fucked for the next three and a half years i told myself it was over. I seemed to end something that was never really there to begin with. Not exactly unexpectedly we started talking again late August, right before I left for school. We talked every night, texted all day and he finally told me he loved me. Afterwards things started to spiral downhill. We were fighting everyday, saying things we knew we’d later regret and eventually we both lost hope. I’m not sure if we were actually in love or if we were just in love with the thought of being in love. I’ll never really know until i find love again.

Advice to anyone who reads this, get out early if you’re not sure about things, if you have doubts.

But hold on with everything you’ve got if you believe it is real.

Always love as if it will be your last. 

(Source: weheartit.com, via coupledlove)

I realized today that this next year will be the most crutical year for my future. Not many people get to do what im about to do. I got accepted to my dream school, my first pick, the only college I applied to and one of the best fashion schools. If I can make it through this next year, I can make it through anything.
Ive spent so much time living for other people, always doing what I think would keep everyone else happy. Its time to start living for me, doing what I enjoy, doing what makes me happy.